Q2: Social Relations (III)

The Story so Far

The Q2 Arena, based on applying atomistic and causal paradigms, deals with fitting in to social relationships as explained in the introduction. The 7 different ways in which it is possible to connect to another person in order to fit in were then developed here, and plotted on a Typology Essentials Table (TET). A spiral dealing with strengthening engagementto another could then be developed here.

Determinants of Orienting to a Social Relation (Q2CHK)

The Tree framework for orientation indicates the near-simultaneous use of all the factors examined in the TET and Spiral. It is likely the way most people will think of fitting in. In bringing the various Centres to life, a person needs to be imbued with a machiavellian spirit, not in a negative sense, but as an expression of realism. You are using the other person instrumentally, subtly or overtly, and for your benefit.

More

Traits like exploitation, hypocrisy and callousness are part of what psychologists have named Machiavellianism, which is a pathological condition and not relevant here. Machiavelli was a wise observer of the human condition. He was concerned with realities of ruling a territory. We are concerned with the realities of ruling oneself. It is surely a fact that total openness and truthfulness are intolerable in social life, and that we must each use each other to some degree as means not ends.

A Tree framework can be created from the Q-Spiral by focusing on the essence of each of the 7 modes as they might emerge in actual situations. This reveals a dynamic duality as well as influences between the determinants.

Application of the Dynamic Duality

Establishing an Instrumental Connection: L1-L4

The lower pole of the internal duality appears to be "establishing an instrumental connection". It corresponds to the inner circle of the TET ("basis for any instrumental relation") and Cycle-1 of the Spiral ("getting aligned with each other").

Level 1: Your intentions and how you express them and to whom are all under your personal control. However, you have no control over the social context in which this occurs, and these two factors cannot be disentangled.

So the Centre is balanced and named:  L1_B-Express Intentions.

Level 2: Your interests, which are under your control, must be linked to the self-interest of the other person, which is not. As the goal is to fuse interests, the two sets of interest cannot be addressed separately.

So the Centre is balanced and named:  L2_B-Channel Interests.

Level 3: There are two people with two sets of strengths that are distinct and independent of each other. Your personal strengths are yours to do with as you wish and the other person has been selected because their strengths, not under your control, are complementary. The relation develops if you can find ways to activate those strengths and use what the other contributes.

So there are two Centres here named:

L3_P-Draw on Personal Strengths

&

L3_S-Tap into the Other's Strengths

The two poles naturally influence each other with your personal strengths appearing to be dominant.

Level 4: Adjusting your expectations is crucial to a constructive satisfying alignment and this is under your control. However, any adjustment is simultaneously a function of the other person as well, which means it is also under their control.

So the Centre is balanced and named:  L4_B-Adjust Expectations.

Maintaining the Relationship: L5-L7

The upper pole of the internal duality appears to be "maintaining the relationship". It corresponds to the outer circle of the TET ("requirements for deepening the relation") and Cycle-2 of the Spiral ("drawing closer together").

Level 5: You have control of the demands that you are placing on yourself and on the other person. The other person can make demands on you and this is outside your control. You must respond and adapt to those demands.

So there are two Centres here named:

L5_P-Reduce your Demands

&

L5_S-Adapt to the Other's Demands

The two poles naturally influence each other with adaptation to the other's demands appearing to be dominant.

Level 6: You have full control over the offering of inducements to the other person. A positive response to receipt of these inducements will be a function of social conventions and the other person's attitudes, and you have no control over either.

So there are two Centres here named:

L6_P-Offer Inducements

&

L6_S-Conform to Social Gift Conventions

The two poles naturally influence each other with conformity to convention appearing to be dominant.

Level 7: Enabling bonding is based on empathic relating that is under your control, but it naturally depends on the receptivity and response of the other.

So the Centre is balanced and named:  L7_B-Enable Bonding.

Psychosocial Pressures

All psychosocial pressures are underpinned by acceptability as the driving force intrinsic to the Change-RL3 domain. This is not shown in the diagrams below.

First there is certainty (1°) based on the Q2 position.

(Performance, 2° in the Q2 position, is not shown in the diagrams below.)

Then, as listed here, certainty (1° from Atomistic paradigm-PH'3L2) in the lower half, and performance (1° from Causal paradigm-PH'3L3) in the upper half.

The duplication of performance and certainty is noteworthy.

The requisite and self-interested Trees (below) show level by level pressures based on the Spiral pattern (see left Tree) and Tree structure i.e. Root Hierarchy (see right Tree).