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Use and Misuse in «Affirming a Bond»

Affirm a Solid Bond to Handle Close Relationships: Framework of all PH-L5s


All the emergent frameworks are dynamic states of creative effort. It is conjectured that they are activated naturally in extremis, when the options of exiting or enduring are rejected. This personal choice is an expression of autonomy and transcendence.

However, these socio-mental options have been observed by others with a strong interest in specific goals. That interest more commonly serves money or power rather than the good of each and all. But not necessarily. Applying a framework in this way is always an imposition on another.

Judgement as to whether this constitutes a use or a misuse of human creative potential will vary. If the user is depersonalized or driven by some inner demon, use may tip into abuse. Each framework is examined from this perspective and the findings are compared and reviewed here.

Psychodynamic Therapy

Understanding is valued by more thoughtful people who have a scientific orientation: a framework that affirms a solid bond naturally attracts those who want to help others manage their relationships through understanding. This the common basis of all schools of psychodynamic therapy, whose assumptions have permeated counselling of all sorts.

Difficulties in interpersonal relationships often repeat. When a person gets into rows with every boss, or abandons every intimate relationship as soon as a deeper commitment is expected, then the problem lies within that person rather than the environment. Psychotherapy and group therapy exclude the other party when seeking to help people with authority or intimacy problems; while marital and family therapists directly engage with the problematic interpersonal relationship.

In psychodynamic therapy, it is assumed that problems in the relationship will be reproduced in the therapy sessions. By working through the issues that come alive in therapy, it is expected that the corresponding real-world issues will be better handled. If understanding is a crucial tool within the doctrine, the framework of PH-L5s is naturally applied.

Using the Framework of PH-L5s

KL7: Respect Names. Everyone who enters therapy has sensitivities and these will be associated with particular terms. It is therefore essential for the therapist to be careful about how personal matters are referred to so that there is no undue hurt. In groups, this responsibility falls primarily on the group members.

KL6: Enable Management. Therapists set the system for providing understanding. The rules will be a function of the particular school of therapy e.g. meetings may be daily or weekly, and methods may be directive or non-directive. The therapist imposes management on himself, and generally avoids participating other than to reflect, comment, advise, direct or interpret.

KL5: Clarify Relations. The client is expected to explain the repeated pattern of events that cause them tension or distress. However, they are also pressured to appreciate the views of others about those events. 'Others' here may be anyone at the therapy meeting. Patterns of events within or in relation to therapy are typically identified and analysed.

KL4: Feel Good Risking. Everyone who participates in therapy, including the therapist experiences the process as risky. The exposure of oneself and one's behaviours and comments to possible criticism from others is often painful, embarrassing or guilt-inducing. Even if nothing is said, what goes on in another's mind is imagined.

KL3: Promote Social Values. Clients invariably have needs that are not being met. Often they are barely appreciated. So an essential part of therapy is bringing those needs to light and encouraging their recognition as part of someone's individuality. At the same time, other values that all potentially share are also supported.

KL2: Rely on Intuitions. Intuition is the primary tool for the therapist, and for the clients in their dealings with the therapist, with each other, and in their interpersonal life outside therapy.

KL1: Activate Interventions. There are a range of possible interventions, dependent on the school of therapy and the style of the therapist. These include depth interpretation, confrontations, paradoxical injunctions, reassuring encouragement, practical advice, role play, spiritual practices &c. They must be devised and implemented as the therapy unfolds.

Experience of Being Forced

A person may feel pressured into entering therapy, but therapy cannot be forced on someone. Either they participate willingly or it is a sham. People vary in the type of psychotherapy that is most useful for them, and there are practical and financial issues as well.

The therapist usually does not view the interaction as long-term. Some therapies may be a matter of just one of two sessions, others may last 6 weeks, 6-9 months or up to 18-24 months. At some point, the therapist is likely to bring the therapy to an end if the client refuses to take this initiative themselves. Whether therapy was a success will be a matter of judgement.

If termination does not occur, then there is a danger of dependency without progress. The client then has a gratifying relationship for which they pay. The therapist may experience being forced to continue. Benefits from understanding are non-existent even if it seems as if this emergent framework continues to be in operation.

Last Updated: 24-Mar-2014

All material here is in a draft form. There will be errors and omissions. Nothing should be copied or distributed without express permission. Thank you.Copyright © Warren Kinston 2009-2018. All Rights Reserved.

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